Accidental bits of wit and wisdom

I haven't posted much roommate wit and wisdom for the past few months because, well, I haven't had roommates. But thankfully there is still facebook.

Matt's facebook status a couple weeks ago:

Matthew just did something awesome.

Jodi at 5:54pm October 21

Did you just fly across the English Channel on a body rocket? Cause I just saw that on youtube and that was pretty awesome....

Matthew at 3:33pm October 23

That was pretty awesome! You're close. I actually just sat down. It was awesome. See, if you're like me and you can just piss awesome, awesome happens all the time.

I was going to tell you a story about how I crossed the english channel on a different kind of rocket, but the story sucked more than my illustration of how the story could have happened:

Click here for awesomeness illustrated

An excerpt might have read: "...was cloudy that day. The wind blew in off the channel not unlike a taunting mistress. I looked down at my steely companion between my legs and laughed at my own insecurity, for I knew that this long monster of mine had gotten me through much hairier situations..."